KiddSaraph

Grrrr..

2005-05-12T00:43:42Z

Stupid...fucking...bastard...

When did he get to be such a fucktard? Man, if I'd known things like this were going to happen, I would have knocked his ass down two flights of stairs.

Ehh..Going to the club, come find me if you want me.

It's finally happened...

2005-05-09T04:58:16Z

So, it's official. I'm single. And, well, I'd like to say that I'm upset about it. But hey, it's my fault, and I guess I'll just have to deal with it.

I know it's not worth anything to you, but I'm sorry. I know what I did was wrong, and now I'll have to pay for it. But, take it easy, alright, mate?

Remind me never to see you again. Have a good semester, okay?

Has there been any word?

2005-04-28T23:47:03Z

At all? I feel like I'm going to go insane. Okay, so it's only been a day and a half since Serge's been in the hospital...but...I just wish I knew what was going on. Maybe, if someone can go with me? I just need to find out if he's alright. Or, find out the worst...but I just want to know! Urg...Maria, have you heard anything at all?

Hmm...Maybe I could go into a hospital, just this once... really dunno what keeps me from going in there... Maybe it's because all these people actually are getting the care they need when ~~Lucca~~my mother didn't. I don't know...maybe there's other reasons...

Okay..so maybe I changed my mind. I just don't know anything anymore. Are you free anytime soon?

...Can you get kicked out for possibly putting someone in a coma?

2005-04-18T23:24:39Z

I really hope he's not in a coma...but we don't know anything yet. Yeah. Serge...and I had a ... fight. He...pulled me and made me fall...and so I retaliated. Good thing I stayed conscious...or he would be worse off than he is. Yes, ladies and gentlemen...if Serge dies, or is stuck in a coma, you may all blame me. I knocked him down... into the beautiful stairwell. I was crying in my room as soon as I got back...and Karin had her music up... And yet...she knew to come check on me. She...burned me a copy of her music...I asked her to...so I have an appropriate song for the occasion... Serge...If you come out of this alive...I'm sorry.

Artist: Sonata Arctica
Album: Winterheart's Guild
Title: The Misery
I write the lines you want me to, with the words
I dare to use of all the ones that you have taught me, along the years.

You cast a perfect shadow on the paper
Fade away with sunlight,
I fear the way you know me, love can leave a stain...

You steal my only hope and make me stay awake another night.
I wish you’d bear with me, stay near me.
When the autumn leaves have fallen.
Solitude, my pain, the last thing left of me...

If you fall I'll catch, if you love I'll love,
and so it goes, my dear, don't be scared,
you'll be safe, this I swear.
If you only love me

Seven lonely lies written on Deadwinter's night,
open the only book with the only poem I can read...
In blood I sign my name and seal the midnight with a tear.
Burn the paper, every line for them I cried...

If you fall I'll catch, if you love I'll love,
and so it goes, my dear, don't be scared,
you'll be safe, this I swear.
If you only love me back.

I am the Playwrite and you are my Crown, make me cry for your love,
like you've done many times, so I know
I can't write these storylines without you, lady pain, make me strong,
can't we be together without them forever...

The words I write can only hurt you, sorry for the rain.
Thank you, my only one, you gave me this pain...
I leave you gently on the floor,
take one step towards the door.
Where's the letter never written, good night now...

If you fall I'll catch, if you love I'll love,
and so it goes, my dear, don't be scared,
you'll be safe, this I swear.
If you only love me back.

If you fall I'll catch, if you love I'll love,
and so it goes, my dear, don't be scared,
you'll be safe, this I swear.
If you only love me back.

Poor Serge.

2005-04-11T20:36:37Z

Okay, so Serge's arm isn't broken, which is good. But he did dislocate it. And...it will have to heal for two weeks. Meaning he'll have take it easy, and keep his arm in a sling.

You'd think that this would stop us. hehehehe...
Apparently painkillers are really good.

I passed by my suitemate's room and heard something that sounded like someone practicing with a weapon. I hope it's Karin. She looks the type that would be a fighter. Anyway, Karin, hope you're doing well.

Love to you, Serge.

Nightmares and Sweet Awakenings

2005-04-08T02:51:38Z

Okay, so that nightmare I had really sucked. I hope Sora's okay. And poor Serge had a dream about me dying, again. I'm glad I was able to be alive when he got to me. So that part of the night sucked, until Karin comes, and then Serge. Karin...feels familiar, like I know her... And Serge is the best thing that's ever happened to me...

So the rest of the night was quite pleasant. After the heat slowly ebbed from the both of us, Serge and I fell right to sleep. No dream, no nightmare, no nothing. I know I slept well, but I tend to ... toss a little bit. I don't know if I do when I share a bed, but hopefully Serge slept well, too.

Karin, if you ever read this, I'd like to meet with you again. Something in the way you touched me has me curious. And not in the naughty way. I just felt...like with one touch, I was connected to you, even though we just met. I'd like to try to talk it out with you, see if we can figure out what it is. I'd really like to know...

The Calm Before the Storm

2005-04-05T02:14:12Z

So I met Sora's "friend" Riku. Superior jerk. But what I didn't realize until later, ...why did we almost fight when we want the same thing? I think it's a pride thing, on both our parts. Anyway...Came back to the room and ...everything smelled .....pretty...Like scented soap...

Reading the network...I'm really really confused. Some girl named Lenne touched Vergil?? And kissed him?! Well, that's a first.

At least I got some practice done with my dagger. Even before Mr. Campus Security came up.

Okay, I think things with Sora and Vergil are going okay. Vergil seems to be acting civil. So...I got yelled at for no reason... Meh, better safe than sorry, right? Riku said that if I were to protect Sora, I'd better do a damn good job of it. ...What if I can't protect him? I really care about Sora, and it's true that if you'd let me (which you wouldn't) I'd give my life to save him. But...I'm starting to get scared. You know I never get scared. Things are heating up really bad 'round here. We need more people. More fighters. We need someone...like Lynx. He's powerful enough, and tapped into some deep shit, he might be able to help us. ....How do we get him here? How do we convince him to fight for us? Serge...I'm really scared...

white spikey hair and blue-green eyes, huh?

2005-04-03T07:32:04Z

Met a boy named Sora today. Something told me I should be up, and not just to fetch my dagger. He's a real number. He's really sweet and really happy. It was great finding a friendly face.

Which brings to mind his turmoil. His best friend is missing. A boy named Riku. Earlier on the network, I saw a post by a "Riku". I really hope Sora knows.

Sora...seems familiar. Like I may have met someone like him before. I'm not sure, but I feel a kinship for him. It's not a motherly thing, but a sisterly love. I know it's soon, and I just met the boy, but he has a way of pulling at your heart strings.

So, Sora, if you read this...Be careful. I think your Riku is here. And I think he might try to see you. If he does, don't let him get you down. And if he gets you down, let me know, and we can double team him.

Speaking of Rikkus...I wonder how Rikku's doing...I miss you! I'm...sorry for going MIA. I..had things that I needed to take care of. I'm sorry I didn't tell you. Will you still talk to me after what I've done, Rikku? You know you hold a special place in my heart, Rikku. Thieves have a kindred spirit.

Serge...Thank you. I'm sorry I ran out. I...had to meet Sora. I feel like he's an important part of our team now. He's a real sweetheart. I know you'll love him too.

Anyway, Goodnight all!

...Something about an earthquake?

2005-04-01T22:27:14Z

Apparently, since she's been reading the network posts, Kidd's heard something about an earthquake. Considering the state she has been in lately, she hardly felt the earth move as a result of the fight that occurred.

More later......^.~

Classes?

2005-03-30T03:59:51Z

Ahem. Due to recent developments...the Park RULES! Except I think I left my dagger in that tree. Bah, anyway. Sadly, *coughs* I'm going to have to miss classes as I have...come down with a nasty cold. I can't even speak, my throat's so swollen. Hopefully, it's just the ...pollen? or maybe just a bug running around...anyway, I'll be back in class after I've...gotten better.

First Day

2005-03-29T03:53:44Z

Okay, so yesterday was my first day here at Squenix. I have to admit, I didn't think I'd meet anyone I knew. I thought wrong. I barely put my stuff down and look around before...Serge comes in...
Conflicting emotions of stark terror and deep love for that guy warred inside me. So what did I do? I kissed him...and...then I ran away, like a bleeding coward. What is wrong with me? I can feel how different this world is...and yet I run blindly away from a guy that I will always love. I figured the day would go downhill from there.

Wrong again, thank the gods. I met a girl named Rikku out on the grounds. We clicked, and I think it's safe to say that I've made a friend. She's truly awesome, and I can't wait to hang out with her more! She's Gippal's girlfriend, and just her talking about him is soooo cute. Which strikes a cord somewhere in the mass of strings that make up my heart. Would it really be so bad to have a boyfriend? Rikku and I need to get sneaking, definitely!

Last night was the worst, I must admit. I came back to my room to find the door ajar. Luckily, all my stuff was intact...but...Serge's smell lingers in the air, and on the mattress of my bed where he sat with me. After thoroughly attempting to restrain myself from stabbing the ability to smell out've me, I gave in and cried like a child. Thank the gods my roommate is MIA. I would have been embarrassed.

So..yeah...classes today? Really funny. I was excited because I didn't have to go through the trouble of picking them. Apparently I'm picking up where the 'former Kidd left off. And...I'm in this really awesome class about time travel...with Serge. Hard to stay away from the guy when I'm in a class with him. I really like the class, and I want to stay in it. Guess I'll just deal. Or, beg Rikku to sneak with me soon, hehe.

Speaking of sneaking...I should have been paying attention more to the lesson than to Serge. Kidd's "old" seat is right next to him, and it's a wrench sitting close enough to hear him breathe and feel the puffs of air as he sighs. Which was a lot. Damn it all, if he's not the real Serge, I think I'm going to go insane. gwah, it's homework time, and then sleep.

Back to You

2005-03-27T21:57:46Z

Who: Serge and Kidd
What: A reunion, of sorts.
When: Kidd's "first" day.
Where: Kidd's room
Warnings: None really

Shuffling to her appointed room, Kidd unlocks the door, bracing herself for the reaction of her roommate. Walking in, she notices that there appears to be no sign of the other girl whatsoever. With a sigh, Kidd puts her stuff on the empty side of the room, and sits down on the mattress, surveying her new room.

Serge had decided to take a walk. It was hard being in the room. It made him think of Fei, hopefully he was recovering. He had only made it a few steps down the hall, when he saw the familiar blonde braid and red outfit. He took off full sprint to the room she walked into and skidded to a stop in her doorway. "Babe! Where've you been? You had me worried." He realized he was spitting out phrases a mile a minute and he stopped.

From her vantage point on the bed, Kidd's eyes widened in shock. He's here? she thought. Absently, Kidd's fingers darted to the jagged scar that marred her belly. With a haunted look, she peered at the guy standing in her doorway. "....Serge?" Memories swirled in her mind's eye and she was unaware of the tears flowing down her cheeks. "What are ya callin' me 'Babe' for?"

Serge looked at her. What's going on? He walked in the room and walked up to her. Why is she crying? "Because that's what I call my girlfriend." He smiled lightly and took one of her hands in his. "Unless you've been gone for so long that you forgot."

When Serge took her hand in his, Kidd pulled her hand back as if stung. Girlfriend? She stood up, standing shakily. A furrow formed between her brows and her thoughts raced. When did this happen? "Ah don't know 'xactly what yer talkin' 'bout, Serge. When was Ah ever yer girlfriend, mate?" Kidd fisted her hands into her pockets, to stop them from shaking.

Serge smiled through a half confused look. "You're kidding right? C'mon Kidd now's not the time to be playing games." He looked at her expression and realized that she was serious. The smile quickly disappeared from his face. "We've been together for almost two months. Even though you haven't been around for about half of it." He dropped his head a little. "You don't remember anything do you?"

Now it was Kidd's turn to look confused. I've been here? Why can't I remember? "Ah don't mean ta make ya sad, Serge, but tha last thing Ah remember was you stickin' me own dagger in ma belly. 'Less you've forgotten?" With that, Kidd grabbed Serge's hand and placed it on the scar that split her stomach. Why am I even talking to this guy? A small voice in her head said, Because you love him, girl. "Ah remember diein', mate. And now Ah'm here. Ah can't make sense of anythin'. Mind helpin' a friend out, mate?" The vulnerable look on Kidd's face was completely off-kilter with her strong personality.

Serge blinked. What the hell was going on? "Kidd I...I don't understand. You were here. With me." He looked at her and could tell she was different. "That wasn't me that stabbed you. Lynx and I switched bodies when we came in contact with the Dragon Tear. I tried to warn you but you only took me for my appearance." He could see it replaying in his head again, watching her face as Lynx stabbed her. "You didn't die though. I saw you again. What..what's going on?"

Kidd cocked her head slightly to the side. It was Lynx? "So...you didn't betray me?" Her voice was shaking, and her tears were clinging to her eyelashes. "...Ah know it sounds like nonsense, but after you, er, Lynx, stabbed me, Ah felt so...free. Ah think...Ah think Ah was in...heaven..." A lost look entered Kidd's eyes, and she reached up shyly and touched Serge's cheek with trembling fingers. "Why am Ah here....?" All energy drained from Kidd's eyes and she slumped down to sit on the edge of her bed.

Serge shook his head. "This doesn't make sense. You were alive. Unless that was some part of my imagination that I fell in love with and I've been dating." He looked down at her. "I'm glad you're here. Even if you don't remember 'us'."

"Yer sayin' Ah was here? Bloody hell, mate, Ah down't remember any of it. Ah'm sorry." The empty look on her face deepened, but her tears ceased to flow. "All Ah know is tha' Ah'm a student now, can ya believe it? Me, the lowlife." Her lips broke into a grin, but it failed to spread to her big blue eyes. "Ah'm really sorry if Ah'm not the Kidd yer used to. Ah can only be true ta maself." At that, some of the light flooded back into her eyes.

He nodded a little. So does that mean everything I did have is lost? He felt his eyes burn and water up slightly. He blinked a few times to hold them back. Forcing a smile he looked back up at her. "Well I'm sure you'll do fine here Kidd. You were doing great before." He stood up rather uncomfortably, trying to decide whether to stay or leave.

Kidd resisted the strong urge to stand up and hug Serge, and instead she drew her dagger out of it's place in her boot and began to toss and catch it. Poor guy, he must be really hurting. Sliding her dagger back into her boot-sheath, Kidd stood up and walked up to Serge, her face burning. You know you love this guy, her inner voice whispered. "Serge..." Before she registered what she was doing, she was kissing him, her arms around his neck.

Serge almost jumped out of his skin. One minute she couldn't remember anything and the next it was like their first meeting here all over again. He slid his arms around her waist as he returned her kiss. After a couple minutes of smiling he looked back at her. "Well I guess you still feel the same even if it's not you, huh?"

Kidd shook her head to clear it. Her face was redder than her shirt and her eyes took on the wide, "deer in the headlights" look. She backed out of Serge's embrace, holding her hands up in an uncharacteristic way. "Ah...Ah down't know why Ah did tha'. Ah...Ah can't do this, Serge. Ah jus' got here and find out tha' you di'n't stick ma dagger in me. How do Ah really know it's you and not Lynx?" The look of shock and terror was replaced with one of black anger. "You'd do well to keep clear o' me awhile, mate." Drawing her dagger so he could see, Kidd held it up in front of her like a shield, and slowly backed out of the room, never turning her back on Serge. Once outside of the room, Kidd fled out of the suite, and ran breakneck through the building until she was out on the grounds.

Serge stood there in complete disbelief. Please say that didn't just happen. He walked to the door and leaned on the doorway for a moment, thinking about what just happened. No! It's not going to end up like this. I've lost her too many times for it to happen again. He clenched his fist and hit the doorway with his right hand. He turned and headed back to his room, he could feel the tears forming in his eyes. He wasn't sure whether it was from hiting the doorway or because of her. Apparently taking a walk was a bad idea for today.

Out on the grounds, Kidd found what looked to be a park, and entered through the yawning gate. Looking around, and thinking about Serge, she realized just how different this world was from her own. What have I done?